As parents, we find ourselves saying things that, when child-free, we never imagined that we would say. Things like, “Don’t spit on the window, that’s gross!” “No, you can’t have cotton candy for dinner.” “Don’t eat crayons.” and the parental standard, “Because I said so, that’s why.” But the one thing I find myself saying the most, or asking rather, is: “Why are you naked?”

And I found myself asking just that question this morning, early this morning. I woke up at about 4:30 this morning, only three hours after I got to sleep. You see, I had made the mistake of eating after I got home from work, then taking an allergy pill, and then conking out on the Widow-maker (the sofa). At 4:30 on this ill-fated morning, I woke with the worst heartburn. I got up, moved over to the comfy chair and tried, in vain, to go back to sleep. (I can’t sleep on our bed right now, the mattress is more uncomfortable than the Widow-maker.) Monkey came stumbling in at about 6 a.m., grumbled a bit, and fell back asleep on the sofa.

At 6:30 am, I was just starting to doze off again when Pumpkin put in an appearance, wrapped in her blanket. She wasn’t interested in going back to sleep, she wanted to play. I got her a cereal bar, turned on some cartoons, told her to be quiet, and went back to sleep. Some time later, I woke up and looked over at my little blanket-wrapped sweetie. The blanket wasn’t completely wrapped around her and I could tell she was no longer wearing her shirt.

“Why are you naked?” I asked for about the millionth time. “That because I took off my clothes,” she answered. (I was a little shocked, it’s mostly been rhetorical until this point.)

Turns out she was starkers; I gotta remember to wash that blanket. So I stumbled around, found some mismatched shorts and shirt for her, and managed to put the shirt on top and the shorts on bottom. I still can’t tell if she just likes to be au naturel or if she likes to change clothes a lot. After we got home from Mayfest today, she decided that her current dress just wouldn’t do. She stripped down and demanded a new shirt. Right now she’s on outfit-of-the-day number 4 (if you count the blanket-toga).

This is why I can’t get ahead on the laundry.

As I sit here on this historic day, watching that history unfold on my TV, I am struck by the utter disregard my daughter has for the solemn events we are watching. So far I have received one request for Pink Panther, one for “Pongo” (101 Dalmatians), and two crying fits when I told her “No.” Now she is rapidly emptying a tissue box and making a small mountain out of the tissues.

Well, it’s ridiculous to expect a toddler to appreciate something I consider exciting but that she has proclaimed boring. And it is exciting, instead of gazing longingly to a past that never really existed, we, as a country, are once again looking resolutely into the future. And once again we will have a president who addresses the American people as the adults that we are.

I think the chief failing of the out-going administration (and most conservatives) is that they do not see the American people as adults that are capable of making our own decisions, they do not trust us to handle the hard stuff. The Great Depression could have destroyed the country but the strength of the citizenry kept it alive. During WWII, the tough-minded American people did what was required to defeat the greatest threats our world had ever faced. Tire-rationing, food-rationing, women taking over “man’s work” to free men to fight, Civil Air Patrol, black-outs, the American people coped very well, soldiered on, made do, made it work.

After 9/11, did the administration ask the people to sacrifice any material comfort for the good of the country? No, they told us to go shopping, to travel, to spend money as if there were no tomorrow. Oh, we sacrificed all right, our civil liberties, the assumption that our private telephone calls were truly private, our dignity at the airport, too many of our brave service men and women. We weren’t even asked to forgo paltry tax cuts so our troops could have little luxuries like body armor. But now many people have unwillingly sacrificed much of their life savings, many have sacrificed their homes.

Were those who benefited the most from the CEO-president asked to sacrifice their golden parachutes when their companies began to falter? Are you kidding me? The CEO-president asked us, the tax-payers, to bail out his buds!

At a time when it was easy to blame the “other”, were we asked to set aside old prejudices and come together in unity? No, grievances were allowed to fester, bigotries were encouraged. We were told to fear the “other”, to fight them over there so we don’t have to fight them over here. Innocent people, whose only crime was practising a different faith than most other Americans, were detained in airports and escorted off planes.

I interrupt this post with the joyous news that Obama is now officially our president even before he takes the oath of office. Great day in the morning!

The old administration did not trust us with the truth, they did not trust us with their mistakes, they thought we were too weak to handle the difficult road ahead and tried to deceive us that the road was a smooth one.

President Obama trusts us enough to admit that the road ahead is a tough one, but that we can meet and exceed the challenges. He understands that we come from tough stuff. Every single American born in this country is the descendant of people tough enough to cross land bridges during the last ice age, to make perilous ocean voyages, to leave the comforts of home to carve a new life out of the wilderness, to survive and surmount slavery, to fight for independence, to fight to keep our country united, to survive deadly epidemics and find cures for them, to claim, demand and fight for the inalienable right to be treated as full and equal citizens, to rise up and demand the right to vote, to walk The Trail of Tears, to retain their sovereignty in the midst of hostile forces, to have their land taken away and forced to move to reservations and survive, to endure internment with dignity. Our naturalized citizens all took the difficult steps to leave their homes and start a new life here. No matter how desperate their previous existences may have been, no matter how war-torn or destitute their old homes were, it is still painfully difficult to pull up stakes, forsake roots, leave family and friends, say farewell to familiar sights and faces, to chose to live among strangers, to learn a new language, to adapt to new ways of doing things, yet thousands of people do just this every year.

We are, all of us, tough-minded people, capable of surmounting any difficulty that we face. And I have complete faith that President Obama’s administration will treat us as competent adults. I believe that his administration will trust all of us to make our own private sometimes difficult medical decisions for ourselves. I hope that his administration will usher in a new era of tolerance, compassion, and acceptance for all people.

But my little daughter doesn’t grasp any of this because she has no knowledge of the past eight years. And apparently neither do these people up in Wyoming and many others just like them. People were so concerned about Bill Clinton “taking away their rights” that militias multiplied like cockroaches. But it was Bush who presided over the biggest retreat on civil liberties in decades. And now these same types of folks are worried about Obama infringing on their rights!

I wonder exactly what sorts of rights people are concerned about losing. The right to have guns? Contrary to popular opinion, Democrats and other assorted liberals do not want to disarm the public. We want hunters to have their firearms, we want law-abiding citizens with the proper training and permits to pack heat, when appropriate. We just want to keep the criminals, the mentally unstable, the rage-driven nutjobs from having easy access to guns. We want waiting periods and cooling-off periods, we want children to make it through childhood unscathed even if daddy has a handgun, we want places of business to be able to keep guns out of the workplace if they so choose. WE DO NOT WANT TO TAKE ALL YOUR GUNS!!!!! Please get over yourselves.

Are they afraid that now with a black man in the White House, they won’t feel as comfortable making racist jokes? Good. Discomfort is a sign that you should stop. Are they afraid they will have to stop hating gay people and, you know, start treating them like human beings? Hatred and fear are terrible things to harbor in your heart and your soul will shrivel and die as a result, and we can’t make you stop hating, but we can insist that you treat other human beings with dignity and respect.

They seem to be afraid that their religious liberties will be compromised. I simply don’t get this. This country was founded without requiring religious tests for holding public office and without establishing a state religion. Our founding fathers had seen first-hand the dangers inherent in a state religion and many colonists came here to escape real religious persecution, not the “persecution” some modern church members claim to experience. Religious persecution tries to keep you from practising your faith. Not being able to force others to abide by your faith is NOT persecution. Get over yourselves.

Are they as worried about leaving a huge national debt as they say? Too late, baby! Bush already did that for you. It’s a little late to be getting your underpants in a wad over it.

I’ve got it! They’re afraid that all their trans fats will be replaced by olive or canola oil, that the air they breath may become cleaner under a president who doesn’t despise the EPA, that some of those lazy, useless, good-for-nothing endangered species may be protected. After all, who needs healthy oceans and diverse habitats? Soylent Green, anyone?

Wow, imagine the affront to one’s dignity should the partially hydrogenated oil in snack cakes be replaced by polyunsaturated fats! The horror.

Honestly, can’t the right come up with anything better to be concerned about? Oh yeah, terrorism. Well those wars have totally turned out great, huh? There have totally not been any more terrorist attacks anywhere since….oh, wait, there have.

We already live in a surveillance society, unless you never leave your home, you are photographed or filmed in lots of public spaces, from banks to department stores to parking lots. Your banking habits are subject to scrutiny, as are your overseas calls. And all this happened way before President Obama was even elected.

I personally am looking forward to the next four years, the new era we are entering promises to be exciting and scary and ultimately fulfilling.

Congratulations, Mr. President, you earned it!

It is a beautiful, warm, Oklahoma fall day, perfect for casting an historic vote. I proudly, and with tears of joy welling in my eyes, cast my vote for Barack Obama and Joe Biden. And all the other Democrats on the ticket. I vote straight-party ticket, always have, always will.

I even managed to escape without injury!

Honestly, I don’t know how any person of good conscience could still vote Republican, especially after the past eight years. I am utterly baffled and truly wish that someone could explain it to me. How can a so-called “values voter” find common ground with the robber barons of the right? How can a so-called christian reconcile the teachings of Christ with the depredations of the GOP? How can a struggling family ally themselves with personification of the economic policies that authored that struggle?

Do people honestly believe that the party that gleefully sacrifices the lives of our valiant soldiers and innocent civilians and licks its chops at very thought of lethal injection or the electric chair shares their views about the sanctity of life? Anti-choicers, you are being used and you will be jettisoned when they find you no longer useful.

How can folks who claim Christ as their savior reject His instructions to love our neighbors as ourselves,  to clothe the naked, feed the hungry, heal the sick, to not stand on the street corner to pray, to be peace-makers? And by the way, that’s “suffer the little children” not make the little children suffer. The Republican party stands at direct odds with the teachings of Jesus, and yet so many of the faithful cling to false hopes that the GOP feeds them, lapping up the lies that ooze out of the mouths of the right wing pundits, preachers, and politicians. Starving at the feet of their masters, they pant after whatever crumbs fall off the table of the greedy.

The only thing I can understand is that the GOP feeds the fears, petty hatreds, and ignorance of its base, the basest of its base.

As for me, I will not be a prisoner of fear, I will not allow hate to rule me, and I forcefully reject ignorance. I vote for the future, not the past. I vote for bright hopes. I vote Democratic. And I voted for Obama!

Yesterday evening we drove over to Quiktrip to get a bag of ice and some desperately needed (by Monkey) bubble gum. While I was waiting in line, rather impatiently I might add as the bag of ice was dripping on my toes, I heard a very interesting exchange.

There was a very cute goth/punk/pagan girl standing in line in front of me. Her goth/punk/pagan boyfriend was talking to her very loudly. He said (and I paraphrase) “Now, you are next in line! Don’t let any of these other people push in front of you again. This always happens to you! You’re next! Only that guy was here before you were, all these other people walked up after you did!”

It may have sounded to an untrained ear as if he were yelling at her, berating her in public. But he wasn’t. He was addressing other people’s behavior problems in the most diplomatic means possible. He was putting everyone else on notice that his girlfriend was being treated rudely and he was not about to stand for it. I felt an immediate connection to this girl, to this couple. You may remember, from my last post, the man and his eight family members who tried to line-jump me at the food court. Well, this seriously happens to me all the time! Unless Hubby is with me. Nobody ignores Hubby. He is a big, tall, imposing guy and strangers don’t know he’s just a really nice man. The boyfriend probably sees that all the time, too.

The boyfriend was no where near as big as Hubby, but as he is goth/punk/pagan he probably scares the bejeebers out of people. I don’t say pagan lightly, they were both wearing/tattooed with pentagrams. I have never been scared of goth/punk/pagan people, why would I be? I used to dress like that. In fact, I still have an affinity for black clothing, kind of like Johnny Cash. Just call me The Mom in Black.

Anyway, not only was this girl dressed the way I used to dress, she was wearing nerd glasses much like mine. I looked at her and thought, OMG! This is me twenty years ago! Since she’s probably used to being treated like she’s a scary weirdo, (gasps, hushed and hidden whispers, mothers pulling their children away in fear that the weird may be contagious) I knew I had to say something nice and positive to her. Just to let her know that there is somebody out there who gets it.

I could’ve commiserated with her over the line-jumping thing, but it may be as sensitive a subject for her as it is for me. So I decided to compliment her appearance in some way. I liked her glasses and the very impressive spiked collar she was wearing, but I chose to say her wallet was cute. She was holding it quite prominently on the counter in front of her, almost brandishing it, but more closely, putting it on display. And I don’t blame her, it was a truly interesting wallet. It looked just like this one.

I absolutely love things that are dark and kind of creepy. Halloween is vying with Christmas for favorite holiday status. My favorite tales are supernatural ones: ghosts, Bigfoot, Loch Ness monster, vampires, ghost-lights, UFO’s. I don’t care for the gory stuff though.

So I said, “I love your wallet. That is so cute!” She answered, “Thanks! I got it on E-bay!” You can never go wrong complimenting a lady’s handbag.

Attention local grocery store chain:

Big bags of organic fertilizer (AKA bags of poop) + stacked right outside the front door + 90 degree day = REALLY BAD IDEA.

That is all.

We did an inordinate amount of running around this weekend, pretty much like always. We needed some stuff for the House and Hubby wanted some wine and wineglasses for Father’s Day. This was all on the whiteboard I keep on the fridge.

Along with some other things, all written by Hubby (except for ADAM, which was written by Monkey of course). He has the worst handwriting. To the untrained eye, our list may appear as this:

• Tvash Caus
• Smoke Detecnvs
• Surge Supressov
• ADAM
• o x o corn holders
• 11 choppers
• more chip clips
• wine
• wine glasses

Hug-and-Kiss corn holders? And don’t you think one chopper would be enough, even if you weren’t sure if we were talking about motorcycles, helicopters, or vegetable choppers. It’s that last one by the way.

We took the whole crew to Bed Bath and Beyond and came home with a bag full of this:

Apparently, the House is keeping OXO in business. The coffee mug and the (one) chopper are fairly self-explanatory, but I think some background will help on the other stuff.

Chip clips–I cannot tell you how many of these things I have thrown away, usually stuffed down in cereal boxes. We’re on about our tenth package of them. Hubby thought the big red ones would be good, he’s probably right, they are more noticeable. Maybe I won’t be so inclined to throw those away.

Corn holders–the set we bought last summer fell apart, because they cost about a dollar. And we’re gonna need them soon, it’s nearly time to go buy a couple of bushels of corn from Conrad Farms in Bixby.

Measuring cups and spoons–I don’t care for cooking, but I love to bake. Over the years, various pieces from my previous sets of cups and spoons have gone missing. The spoons have largely fallen prey to the garbage disposal, even some of the metal ones. The cups are a little harder to explain, I think one or two of them have been left in bags of flour. If it’s been a while since I baked anything, and there’s not much flour left in the old bag, I’ll start over with a new bag. It’s very likely that some cups have been thrown away with flour remnants.

We did buy two items not made by OXO–a little trash can for Monkey’s room (he loves having his own trash can and has been finding things to throw in it), and a sleep mask for me. I’m still debating whether I should wear it or not, at night of course.

That was yesterday. Today we went to a bookstore, finished grocery shopping, and ate an early dinner. Hubby took a nice, long Father’s Day nap when we got home. The kids absolutely did not stay quiet or calm, but he managed to sleep through all the ruckus.

After one of my many, futile tries at getting them to pipe down, I found this little guy.

For all the world, just sitting there, looking like he’s waiting for a bus. And then this:

The crime scene. And the culprit?

Pumpkin.

You know, that harried-mom-look. I really have to work on my facial expressions. A couple of weeks ago when we were at the grocery store, and my children were up to their usual antics, the cashier took a look at me and asked, “Are you o.k.?” Of course, I answered, “Uh, yes.” Now really, what am I supposed to say to that? Well, actually the little monsters are behaving even worse now than they did all day home, and let me tell ya honey, at home they were horrendous!

Tonight we planned to get carry-out from our favorite hole-in-the-wall Mexican place but our plans were quickly dashed when we pulled up to an empty and dark building. The paper signs on the windows said they were closed due to the electricity being out. Still. (The storm that knocked out a bunch of people’s power was on Saturday morning.) So we went over to Utica Square and ate at Pepper’s, another of our favorite places. By the time our server arrived to take our drink orders the children were already fighting over the crayons. He asked us what we wanted and I said, “I’ll take a water and water for the kids, too.” He looked at me and asked, “How about a Margarita?” Surprised by the idea, I said, “Uh, o.k.” Then he quickly rattled off my options-frozen, to which I immediately and forcefully said, “NO!” He continued, “O.k., on the rocks and with salt?” I think I said yes to all that because that’s what I was served. Hubby must have ordered a pop, because it was delivered with the rest of the drinks, you know, the ones I remembered ordering.

So, this guy took a look at me and saw something in my face that just screamed “THIS WOMAN NEEDS A DRINK! STAT!” Well bless his heart for seeing it, because that Margarita was perfectly done and perfectly hit the spot. Hubby took a picture of me and my drained glass, with a caption of “Now happy momma” and put it on his Brightkite.

And I was “Now happy”, that drink really took the edge off. I am so at a place in my life where I get the “Valium Housewife”-thing. Not that I would do that stuff, but self-medicating with the occasional Margarita doesn’t sound like such a bad idea.

I meant to write about Mother’s Day weekend way before now, but such is life. Friday was my open house at nursing school, where I was inundated with valuable information; and I’m really glad they gave us paper versions of everything or I wouldn’t remember a word of it. Saturday was Monkey’s Day. We dropped Pumpkin off at my folks’ and took Monkey to his first movie theater movie. We took him to see “Speed Racer”, thinking the racing cars would be a good fit for his little racing mind. He made it through about an hour. He liked the huge bag of popcorn and the giant pop he shared with Mama (two potty trips, thank-you-very-much), but the movie was a little intense. About half-way through, he closed his eyes and told me he wanted to take a nap. That means he’s scared and doesn’t want to look anymore. So when we asked him if he wanted to leave he said, “Yes.” So we played an arcade game on the way out and took him to Peppers for lunch.

We sat outside and enjoyed the beautiful weather. And Monkey spilled salsa on my feet. After lunch, we made the much-dreaded trip to the mall. But we didn’t have a choice because that’s where the Apple Store and Sephora are. I got my Mother’s Day presents a day early–an iPod and a nice, long time browsing in Sephora all by myself. Not only did I get my mom some great philosophy products, but I also picked up some perfume for myself, V by Valentino. It’s yummy. Now, I am not the fanciest of girls, but I LOVE Sephora! It’s like a candy shop for grown women.

I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve been a bit of a Luddite when comes to all this computer stuff. That is until I needed to get proficient, fast, for my first online class. Now I have three blogs (how’d that happen!) and pay bills online and shop online and can even put together a pretty good Word document. But the last personal music player I owned was back in probably 1989, a Walkman that played actual tape cassettes. Most of which were mix-tapes recorded for me by sympathetic friends. Now, I am the proud owner of Pinky, a (big shocker) pink iPod nano. She is named Pinky, not only for the obvious reason, but also for Pinky Tuscadero, ex-love of the Fonz. I always loved her, and ached to be that cool. Wow, that’s a lot of pink.

Last night I went to iTunes and bought my first 50 songs. No albums yet. And if I do say so myself, that is the oddest mix of songs; I’ve got everything from Ministry to Mozart. Lot’s of Eighties, some modern electronica, and very dark classical. Oh, and Johnny Cash covering NIN’s “Hurt.” Just odd, I tell ya.

After I downloaded all my new stuff, I played with my new iPod for about 2 hours. I was bouncing around to the music and Hubby started laughing at me. He told me I needed to go to the kitchen and make a sandwich, a la Terminator. I cracked myself up today, because after we dropped Monkey off at school and came home, I went into the kitchen and made myself a sandwich. All while dancing around the kitchen and singing out loud to the songs. But alas, no cybernetic assassins from the future showed up. Just me and my sandwich, and Pinky.

Some things the House does right:

1)We bought an existing house, 2)We walk Monkey to school in all but the very worst weather, 3)I quit taking the daily paper, 4)Reusable grocery bags! 5) Buy local food when available, 6) Don’t own a Suburban anymore, 7)Recycle the copious number of magazines that we always seem to have, 8)Re-use plastic bags, 9)HE front-loading washing machine, 10)Fluorescent light bulbs.

Things we do that aren’t so good:

1)Disposable diapers, 2)Buy water, 3)Forget to compost, 4)Forget to recycle everything else, 5)Old house is not well-sealed.

One thing we’ve done that is better for the environment, but is actually done to save money: curtailed or eliminated driving-for-fun.

Something we’ve done that is better for the world, but is actually done to spare our frazzled nerves and keep from pissing off strangers-that-never-did-anything-to-us: Take the kids on a real vacation (we always drive).

Someday(doesn’t everyone say that?), I’ll do better. Solar power for the House, hybrid or electric car, alternatives to air-conditioning for the House, gray water for the yard.

Things I need to do NOW: plant a vegetable garden, put up a clothesline, potty train Pumpkin, recycle everything recyclable, compost all plant matter, remember to turn off the power strips at night.

And I don’t care if this is Oklahoma and it does start getting pretty hot this early, I REFUSE TO TURN ON THE DAD-GUMMED AIR CONDITIONER IN APRIL!!!!!!!11!!one!!!!!!eleven!!!!!!

I really want to get my kids these books, mainly because they need to learn more about my politics than what they hear me grumble about everyday. As a mom, I find it absolutely essential to be politically active. We take the kids with us when we vote and that’s a big improvement over what I grew up seeing. My parents were too busy keeping body and soul together to teach us about political issues and I don’t fault them for it. I do, however, fault them for repeatedly voting against their own best interests when they did vote.

It may be out of fashion to refer to myself as a liberal, more people are using the term progressive, but I like liberal because I see nothing wrong, and everything right, with being a liberal. Especially since I don’t see conservatives caring about the things that are important in my life. Family values? Don’t make me laugh. Whenever somebody on the right bleats about “family values”, it’s code for “we hate gay people.” Check it, you’ll find I’m right. “Traditional family values” is even worse. The gay-hatred still applies but with a goodly portion of woman-hating dolloped on top. These “traditionalists” hate and fear women so much that they believe the only way to save society from the girl-cooties is to severely limit the rights of women.

But they don’t really care about families or children or women. Or old people or disabled people or poor people or people that don’t look exactly like them. As a woman and mother, I know that to vote republican is to vote against the very things that I love-my family, my home, my future, my children’s future, my elderly grandmother, my elderly MIL, my civil liberties, my country. And since I’m a decent human being, I also don’t want to vote against my neighbors, classmates, acquaintances, friends, or strangers in need.

Some mothers feel or claim that they are too busy to be politically engaged, but I believe that in order to be  good parents we are obliged to know as much as we can about the things that could negatively or positively impact our children. If people refuse to research the issues themselves and form their own opinions, then they will just believe what some politician, preacher, or pundit tell them to believe. These people are literally handing over their freedom, their free-will, their minds to someone else. Example: someone who believes that the administration (and political party thereof) that refused to expand SCHIP to cover more uninsured children actually cares about the “babees” involved in reproductive choice is uninformed at best, deluded and foolish at worst. If republicans actually cared about any children whatsoever, that care and compassion would not cease at birth.

Look, moms, if you truly care about your kids (and I know you do), get involved, get informed, get wise. Take the time, make the effort. If every mom in America voted in the best interest of her family and all other families, this would be a much better country for families. We wouldn’t have to make such hard decisions. Leave baby in daycare at six weeks just to work the job the family needs to survive or quit the job and stay home and lose benefits and income; buy insurance the family can’t afford or take a chance that no one gets hurt or sick.

There are many reasons that I am a liberal, but the most important one-my family. I am a liberal because I want my children to live in the best possible world. And I just don’t see that happening in the borrow-and-spend, amoral, corporate welfare, tax cuts for rich white guys, step on the little guy, war-mongering, no civil liberties future the republicans want to take us to at warp speed.

Maybe I should print up the world’s scariest t-shirt: I’m smart, I’m a woman, I’m a mom, I’m paying attention, and I vote.